Erised Pain
by Nyu-sama
Summary: Post book 5, a sad angsty Harry finds himself trapped in the Mirror of Erised, with Draco Malfoy? SLASH! Language, snogging, and a very fluffy end. Short but complete, please read and review!
1. Through the Looking Glass

Disclaimer: I own naught. Am simply joyously toiling in the fields of fandom. Tralalala!

Erised Pain by Nyu-sama

Chapter 1: Through the Looking Glass

Harry felt tired. It was a numbing sort of tired, the kind that made the world spin around you like a blur. Colours flashed by him, he heard voices call to him; but what he saw and what he heard didn't always register. Most days he lived through as a zombie. Not dead but not alive. He'd given up Quidditch; he didn't care to play anymore. He'd given up studying; his marks didn't matter anymore. His professors and the headmaster always looked at him with a prying concern, but they never said anything. There was nothing for them to say.

There wasn't much for anyone to say. Ron and Hermione looked after him; making sure he ate and dressed warm enough. If they didn't he probably would've starved or frozen to death already. He didn't notice things like that anymore. All he could feel was the pain inside. It ripped at him like daggers; the guilt. He was too weak, it was all his fault. Cedric's death, Sirius death, even his parents' deaths he blamed himself for. And all the deaths that were to come. It was all his fault.

These feelings pressed down upon him, smothering everything else. He didn't know what he wanted anymore. He didn't want to be a hero, he didn't know if he even wanted to be a wizard anymore, but he couldn't fathom being normal either. This bothered him; surely he should want something from life. He thought he wanted family. But now the idea of family scared him, it was just more people to lose.

What did he want? He couldn't think of one thing he wanted. Everything seemed futile. Bu this lack of desire haunted him. He knew it was unnatural. But how to fix it? He only knew one way.

So late one night armed with the marauders map and covered in his cloak of invisibility he stalked the halls of the castle. He would find it; he knew he would, though he had no idea where to look. He simply let his feet guide him all over the castle, until he opened a door and saw it there. Ominous and powerful it stood, the window to his subconscious, the Mirror of Erised.

He felt a bit of fear then. The fear that he would look into it and see nothing. But it drew him in, and he looked into the mirror. He saw his reflection. He felt defeated, but then he saw himself reach up and touch the mirror. He thought it strange. His desire was to touch the mirror? This didn't make much sense, but he didn't argue. He reached up and touched the mirror, his hand directly over the hand he saw in the mirror. But beneath his fingers the surface was not smooth, it felt like liquid. Before this anomaly could register in his mind, he felt himself falling. He plunged through water like a hurtling bullet. The cold pierced through him, ripping into his heart, washing it clean. He felt his feet touch ground, and opened his eyes. He saw the room he had just been in, but not quite. Everything was flipped here, like a mirrored reflection.

The mirror was in this room too, but now he could see that its surface was liquid by the way it waved. He though about walking back through it. But he felt a hand on his shoulder. He abruptly turned around and looked into the eyes of Draco Malfoy.

Yet was it really Draco Malfoy? Something was different, he was flipped as well. Left and right had switched places in this world. The world behind the mirror.

"What are you doing here Malfoy?" Harry's voice was hoarse and tired like the rest of him. Draco's voice however was light and teasing.

"You should know Potter. This is the world of your desires."

"My desires? Then what are you doing here?"

"Who would you rather have?"

Harry shrugged. Why Malfoy? Of course, why not Malfoy? Harry felt in odd sort of consolation with his presence. Malfoy would not try to comfort him. Malfoy would not patronize him. Malfoy would not give him sympathetic and concerned looks. Malfoy would not act like he was a hero and saviour of the world. Malfoy would treat him with indifference. Harry could not ask for more than that.

"No one." He answered finally.

Draco nodded smugly. "No one else is here. There is no Voldemort, there is no Dumbledore. It's just us."

Harry stood silent for a moment, thinking. Then he grabbed Draco and kissed him hard. Draco pulled back sharply and slapped Harry across the face. Pinpricks of blood trickled down where Draco's nails had contacted with flesh. Harry smiled, a bit giddy. He touched his cheeked and looked at the blood on his fingers, this made him feel alive.

"Hit me again." He said.

Draco looked nonplussed. "If you'd wanted me to beat you to a bloody pulp Potter, all you had to do was say so."

"Beat me to a bloody pulp."

So Draco advanced. At first Harry stood still, taking the beating. Then he felt his inner resolve strengthen, and began to fight back. When both boys were too bloody and exhausted to continue, they lied down next to each other on the stone floor.

Neither spoke for a while.

An hour later Harry sat up. "It doesn't hurt anymore."

"Are you sure? I thought I'd broken your nose for sure."

"I think you did too," Harry gingerly touched the misshapen lump in the centre of his face. "But that wasn't what I meant. Inside. Inside it doesn't hurt."

"Oh, I see. You've finally let your rage out then."

"I think so. I guess I could go back through now."

Draco frowned. "Why would you want to? You go back out there and you'll just have to face it all again. Here none of it matters. Here you're safe."

"You think I should stay here? With just you, in a place that isn't real?"

"If you wanted other people they would be here. And this place is better than reality. Do you really want to leave?"

Harry shrugged, Draco continued. "There's nothing to worry about here, no responsibilities."

Harry let out a long ragged sigh, "but I still have responsibilities back there."

"Do you want those responsibilities?"

"No, but not wanting them doesn't make them go away."

"Here it does."

Harry shrugged again, and then turned towards the mirror. It still rippled like water, but when he reached out to touch it the surface turned hard. Harry whirled back around to Draco and looked at him accusingly. "How do I get out?"

"You can't"

"Why can't I?"

"Because you don't really want to. You're acting out of obligation not desire, until you actually desire to leave you won't be able to."

There was nothing Harry could say to this. So he just lay back down by Draco. If he couldn't leave no one could blame him for staying. He let out a pent up sigh and smiled.

Harry's absence did not go unnoticed. The mysterious disappearance of Harry Potter was the most common topic for conversation around the school. When Draco Malfoy heard of this he simply shrugged, gave a sarcastic remark and smirked.

Some of the teachers and students were frantic though. Especially Ron and Hermione, they were devastatingly worried. Dumbledore however, seemed nonchalant, as if students disappeared all the time without a word goodbye. "Harry will come back to us when he's ready." Was all he would say. The newspapers were having a heyday with the story and various speculations about Harry sneaking off to defeat Voldemort in secret. They would've been highly disappointed if they'd known Harry was lying by the lake in his mirror world, sipping pumpkin juice and bantering with a faux Draco Malfoy.

Harry didn't know how long he'd been trapped in the mirror. But he didn't really care; he was enjoying himself way too much. He felt no burdens weighing upon him, no guilt either. For the first time in what seemed like ages, Harry was happy.

He'd taken up flying again; racing with Draco for hours, tossing the quaffle back and forth, and also hunting for the ever-elusive snitch. He'd forgotten how much he loved the simple pleasures of flying. It was these small things that made life worth living, he realized. He looked for these tiny pleasures now; swimming, watching cloud formations, gazing at the stars, eating chocolate, and teasing Draco. He especially liked teasing Draco. He found it odd the way he felt his feelings towards Draco changing. And he started to think that maybe his desire for Draco to be the only person here was more than just a want to be treated with the indifference Draco's company afforded him.

One morning Harry wandered down to the dungeons to test this theory. He banged on the door of the Slytherin portrait hole. "Oi, Malfoy! Are you up and dressed yet, you vain git!" Moments later Draco opened the portrait looking miffed, toothbrush in hand. "What do you want Potter?" he said dryly.

"I had a question."

"It couldn't wait until after breakfast?"

"Mmmm, no. Not as such."

"Really? Such urgency, I suppose it's important then. Oh well, you'll have to wait till I've finished brushing my teeth. So sorry." And with that he shut the portrait door in Harry's face. Harry smiled; he'd actually grown to enjoy the altercations they had. It really was a lot of fun. Why hadn't he let it be fun before? He couldn't remember, that life in the other Hogwarts seemed so long ago.

When Draco finally emerged fully ready to face the day, he saw Harry leaning against the wall waiting for him. "Honestly Draco, it shouldn't take half the morning to dress."

"I don't know what you're talking about Harry. It's only eight. Really, some people need specific amounts of beauty sleep. But I suppose you wouldn't know anything about that now would you?"

Harry laughed in response. Interestingly enough, Harry was finding himself less and less tired. Sleep seemed rather tedious now. There was so much he'd rather do.

"Now what did you want so urgently answered?" Draco questioned with a raised eyebrow.

"I decided it could wait until after breakfast. I got quite hungry waiting for you."

They made their way to the great hall continuing to banter.

After breakfast they sat on the grass outside enjoying one of Harry's new pastimes, cloud watching.

"That one looks a little like a bent up dragonfly, don't you think?"

"No, it rather reminds me of Trelawny."

"Well same thing then."

They chuckled together.

"So Harry, the question. Are you ever going to ask me?"

"Oh yes that. I was wondering what you'd do if I kissed you again."

"Kissed me? Hum, not sure actually. I might kick your ass, but then I don't fancy getting up. I'm quite comfortable just now."

"Well I suppose I'll have to test you then."

So he did. Draco responded eagerly to the kiss, and Harry was quite pleased. When they broke apart, Harry lay on his back. "Thought as much."

"Thought what?"

"I have a fancy for you."

Draco shrugged. "Not surprising really. I am ridiculously good looking, and with all your pent up raging you're sure to have stunted your sexual growth."

"Well that doesn't sound good."

"Oh well, you're catching up now. Realizing things and all. Before you know it you'll be all mature and well adjusted. Well as well adjusted as you could ever hope for."

Harry smiled, then frowned, thinking. "But why you Draco?"

"Mmmm?"

"Why do I fancy you, of all people?"

"Thin line between love and hate, Harry. I've probably managed more emotional responses from you then anyone. Always keeping you riled, tense, and flustered. Closest thing you ever got to feelings of sexual tension."

"It sounds so logical when you say it."

"Course it does. I'm me, aren't I?"

Harry grimaced. "No actually, you're not you. Not really anyway. Would the real Draco Malfoy just let me kiss him? Or give insight into my subconscious?"

Faux Draco just shrugged. "Who knows? Maybe he'll surprise you someday."

Harry shrugged in return. "Well, I sure as hell have surprised myself."

A good deal of days filled of bantering, flying, lying about, and kissing later. Harry became resolved. "I have to go Draco."

"Go? Where? Hogsmead for more chocolate?"

Harry shook his head sadly, "no, back out."

"On that again are we? Do you really think you can?"

Harry nodded, "I want to go back, Draco. I like being here with you, but I can face all that now. I really can. And for the first time I think I actually want to be their hero. I want to defeat Voldemort."

"You're kidding right?"

"No Draco. I'm dead serious."

"Dead is right. Do you realize what could happen if you go out there? Here you're safe and happy. Why leave for that shit."

"Destiny calls maybe?" Harry smiled, Draco frowned.

"So you're really going then."

Harry nodded. He turned away and found his way back to the room housing the mirror, Draco followed.

"Well good luck, you sodding ponce. God knows you'll need it." Draco drawled, hands in pockets.

"Thanks Draco. I'm really going to miss you out there. We've had fun haven't we?"

"If being stuck with only you for company can ever be considered fun."

Harry took Draco's sarcasm as positive affirmation. He embraced Draco for the last time, kissing him tenderly.

"Goodbye then." Harry approached the mirror and stepped through it. The faux Draco just watched looking slightly annoyed.

This time when Harry passed through he mirror, he felt himself shooting upward like a rocket. He felt alive with anticipation. When his feet hit the stone floor on the other side he noticed two things, his invisibility cloak was gone and having everything flipped right ways around really bothered him now. He brushed these aside, determined not to let this world ruin his newfound spirits. As he turned to leave the room and rejoin the real world, he looked back into the mirror and saw Draco looking at him with an expression that said 'so you're really going to go through with this?'

"Yes, I am." Harry said to himself and went outside.

No, this is not the end. Much more to come.

Can Harry really be happy in the real world?

And what about his fancy for Draco?

Chapter 2: A Jabberwocky of the Heart should be up soon.

Please review, it'd be muchly appreciated!

Ja!

-Nyu


	2. A Jabberwocky of the Heart

Erised Pain by Nyu-sama

Chapter 2: A Jabberwocky of the Heart

Upon leaving the room, Harry realised that it was lunchtime and that he was hungry. When he reached the great hall he stood outside the doors for a minute listening to the bustle inside. This unnerved him, he gotten used to the quiet of the other world. Despite this, he opened the doors, strode into the hall and over to the Gryffindor table. Casually sitting down by Ron and Hermione, he started to load his plate full of food.

The hall was dead silent. For two months Harry Potter had completely vanished, and now he was serving himself a large piece of shepherd's pie. The quiet bafflement that had overtaken the room faded quickly as Hermione, Ron, and most of the Gryffindors launched themselves at Harry. Harry dropped his fork in surprise as he felt multiple pairs of arms embrace him. Hermione was sobbing into his shoulder, and Ron had a hand gripped tightly on Harry's arm, as if he was afraid that letting go would cause Harry to vanish again, tears were running down his face also. Chatter exploded all around him, voices kept asking "where've you been Harry?"

"Oh, I just needed to sort some things out is all." He smiled weakly at the crowd of people pressed around him. "Would it be alright for me to eat my pie now?"

Everyone noticed the change in Harry. He smiled now. He ate heartily. He paid attention in classes. And he talked. He talked about quidditch, homework, the weather, his favourite type of cloud (the wispy kinds that look like cotton candy). He'd talk about anything really, to anyone that would listen to him. He'd talk about anything, except where he'd been the past two months. This he kept to himself, but with everything else he was an open book, displaying his emotions to anyone who cared to look. Of course his emotions consisted of happy, amused, satisfied, content, and pleased. His behaviour was so completely different and unusual that many were convinced Harry Potter was dead and the person before them was a fake created by Dumbledore.

Ron and Hermione knew better. They recognized him as himself, but they couldn't fathom what had happened to change him so dramatically.

They confronted him on this. "Harry, some people are saying you're a robot," Hermione started in abruptly. "We know that you're not, that's silly. But where were you? What happened?"

Harry looked at them, humour glinted in his eyes. "I didn't go anywhere. Never even left the castle."

"Come on Harry, we're your friends! You can tell us." Ron looked agitated, but Harry merely smiled.

"Did they send you to St. Mungo's?" Hermione's voice was quiet and concerned. Harry shook his head.

"Are you on drugs mate?" Ron asked voice pleading. Harry shook his head again. "Under a spell then? Cheering charm? A really good long-lasting one?"

Harry laughed, his head tilting back. "No guys, none of the above. I can't tell you where I've been. But everything's alright now, there's no need to worry." And he truly believed that, that is until he ran into Draco Malfoy the next day.

He bumped into Draco on his way down to the Quidditch pitch. Harry felt like flying that day, and the Slytherin's had just finished practice.

"Well Potter, you're back and in one piece too. Can't say I'm not disappointed. With your affinity for trouble I'd rather hoped you'd be dead by now," Draco drawled.

"Sorry to disappoint you, Draco." Harry smiled, and then looked at Draco curiously.

"What is it Potter?" Draco growled, aware of Harry's intense scrutiny.

"Oh sorry, I'm just not used to your hair being parted on that side is all."

"What?" Draco looked furious. "My hair has always been parted on this side! And since when do you pay attention to my hair? And why are you calling me Draco? It's Malfoy to you!"

Harry just grinned at him, suppressing a chuckle. "Whatever you say, Draco."

That did it. Draco swung, and Harry went down.

"How dare you act so familiar with me? Everyone else may be happy to see you back, but I'm not. Got that potter? We stand where we've always stood. I don't care where you've been or what you've been doing, but nothing has changed between us." And with that Draco stalked off in fury leaving Harry still lying on the grass. For the first time since coming back Harry felt sad. His face contorted into look of bitter anguish. What the hell had he been thinking? The Malfoy here was different than the Malfoy there. He knew that, but he'd pretended he could have the same relationship with this Draco. Of course it was doomed. The faux Draco was his desired version of Draco Malfoy. Close, but not the real thing. He wondered though, could he somehow change that? Would Draco let him? Probably not, but it was worth a try, wasn't it? Especially since he still fancied Draco, it was hard to let it go. "Well," he decided lying on the ground, "I'm going to find away to make it real, even if it kills me. Even if Draco kills me."

This proved easier said than done. Draco was filled with animosity towards Harry, not just the indifference that faux Draco had. And it wasn't until after they had a brawl leaving them both bloody that Harry was able to have an even slightly civil conversation with the blonde.

"Why can't we be friends Draco?"

"It's Malfoy you git! And I gave you that chance a long time ago. You refused."

"Well it was a long time ago, why don't we start over?"

Draco sniggered. "God, you're dense Potter. If you hadn't noticed I'm a death eater's son. And my father's people want you dead."

Harry was unfazed. "But do you want me dead?"

"Do you even have to ask?" he growled, then proceeded to attack at Harry again. "Just die Potter!" Between swings he yelled, "die, die, die!"

After the beating was over and Draco had stalked away again, Harry lay quietly against the cool stones, listening to the sound of his own heart thumping.

Draco hated him, he realized. Utter hatred. How could he possibly circumvent that? After a while Harry rose in a rush and ran to the little room in the back-corridors of the school. He stood in front of the Mirror of Erised, Draco looked back at him. He sunk to his knees. "I can't go back to you. I know what I really want now, it's not you. It's him, the real him."

The Draco in the mirror cocked his head in annoyance. "Don't look at me like that! You're not even real! God, why can't you be real?" Harry covered his hands in his face and cried. What he wanted most in the world he couldn't have. Would it have been better not to know? To go back to the way it was before? Harry picked himself off the floor. He shook his head, he was happier now. This unrequited love was definitely better than those feelings of guilt and hopelessness. At least this drove him on. It hurt but now he had a feeling of purpose and not just the emptiness left from those that had gone beyond.

Harry stayed out of Draco's way. It hurt to look at the other boy. But he wasn't confrontational with him, if anything he was friendly. Draco tried to put Harry off with rude comments, but Harry merely smiled at Draco and let it go. While this behaviour puzzled everyone, it concerned Ron the most.

Finally he called Harry on it one evening in the common room while Hermione was in the library. "What's going on with Malfoy, Harry?" His features were tense as he spoke, brows knitted together.

"What's going on? With Draco? Nothing."

"No, there's something. And calling him Draco? Come on Harry, why're you being so nice to him?"

"Why shouldn't I be nice to him?"

"Because he's a terrible person and would probably kill you if he had the chance."

"I think he could be a good person if he got the chance to be."

"What?" Ron was confused and very concerned for Harry's sanity.

"So I'm giving him that chance. I know there's another side to him Ron. Really, I believe in that other side, and I want to help it come out."

"But why Malfoy?"

Harry timidly turned his face away; when he answered his voice was soft, "because, I've got a fancy for him."

"Oh." Ron couldn't have been more surprised.

"Does that bother you?"

"Well for Malfoy? Honestly I hate the bugger, but if you think you can make him into a decent human being…"

"I mean because he's a boy. Because I'm fancying a boy."

Ron gave Harry a friendly smirk. "Nah, mate. Fancy whomever you please. You've had a tough enough time already, and if he could make you happy, well, I won't begrudge you that. But do you really think you can really be happy with him?"

Harry smiled, relived. "I know I could, Ron. If he'd have me. But he rather hates me, you see."

"Oh, so you noticed that too then?" Ron shook his head. "Harry, you sure do set yourself up for trouble, but it's good to have you back anyhow."

"Yeah? Well I am awfully sorry about those two months, but I-"

Ron cut him off. "I don't mean the two months Harry. Yeah we were worried sick over that, but I meant all year. You weren't yourself; you were here, but not really. I'd look at you and know that most of you was someplace far away, and no matter what I did, I couldn't bring you back."

"Oh?" was all Harry could reply.

"But now you're happy again, and I'm glad. If you want to bugger Malfoy, that's your choice, but I'm just glad to have you back."

Harry was deeply touched, "thanks Ron."

"Aw, don't mention it. Still, it's hard to believe you've actually got a thing for that ferret…"

Hermione took the news of Harry's affection towards Draco Malfoy much like Ron had, but with the addition of a lecture on safe sex that made Harry and Ron blush scarlet. After the embarrassment passed, Ron and Hermione gave Harry a revelation of their own; they were a couple. They'd gotten together during Harry's absence, pretty much because of Harry's absence. They'd been terribly worried and turned to each other for comfort. Harry couldn't have been more pleased for them, but as he watched them together the next few days, he felt a pang inside him. He wanted what they had, and Draco seemed completely unattainable.

Due to Harry's fondness for the Slytherin, Ron and Hermione agreed to be as civil to Draco as they could. This difference in attitude did not go unnoticed by Draco, he tried to be horrifically confrontational, but it didn't seem to get them riled anymore. He had no idea what was going on, and it displeased him a great deal.

Also to Draco's displeasure, he noticed the Gryffindors at large follow suit after the 'golden trio.' Thus causing better relations between Gryffindor and Slytherin. The house rivalries were rapidly dissolving. Draco was absolutely mortified, but there seemed nothing he could do about it.

As Draco resigned himself to the way things had become, Harry's determination to somehow obtain the object of his affections grew. Harry didn't have a plan, but he reckoned he didn't need one. His dumb luck hadn't failed him yet, and he trusted fate to deliver an answer to him. He didn't have to wait long.

Hope you liked Ch. 2.

I seem to be on a roll, so Ch. 3 should be done soon.

Thanks to those who reviewed, it's nice to know I'm being read.

And please review if you haven't, It's greatly appreciated. Prose isn't really my thing, so it'd be nice to know how well I'm doing with this endeavour.

-Nyu


	3. Serendipitous White Rabbits

Erised Pain by Nyu-sama

Chapter 3: Serendipitous White Rabbits

Harry had been flying for a few hours that morning when he noticed a figure watching him. A figure with stunning blonde hair. Harry quickly landed and approached the boy feeling scared and excited at the same time. Draco had searched him out; surely this boded well for his plight?

"You've been flying a lot lately, Potter." This was true.

"Yeah, so?"

"So are you going to play quidditch again? Ginny Weasley is a terrible excuse for a seeker, and the other houses aren't much better. No one's a decent opponent anymore. So, I want to know if you're taking up quidditch again so I can have some decent play?"

Harry was surprised at this, was Draco complementing him? He must be. Harry smiled broadly.

"You want some decent play? Well let's go then."

"What? Now?"

"Why not? It's Saturday and the pitch isn't booked."

"But we're two seekers, how the hell can we have a decent game?"

Harry chuckled, "you'll see Draco." He turned around and started walking towards the supply shed. Draco followed calling "the name's Malfoy, Potter! Malfoy!"

"Alright then," Harry said floating on his broom, a few feet off the ground tossing the quaffle to himself. "I like to call this fast and furious one-on-one."

Draco looked intrigued, so Harry continued.

"The rules are simple, we pass the quaffle between us, it can never touch the ground, and you can only hold onto it for five second at a time. You let the quaffle hit the ground, or you hold it for too long, you automatically lose. We'll also release the snitch, and if you can catch the snitch while abiding the other rules you'll win. Did you get all that?"

"Perfectly. It's going to be fun, kicking your arse."

"You think so? Too bad it's going to be your arse that gets kicked, all the way to your moulding dungeon." And with that Harry released the snitch and took off into the air. "Catch Draco!" he called, and threw the quaffle hard.

Draco caught it deftly, and then they threw it back and forth trying to make the other unable to complete the pass. This continued until Harry saw a fluttering glint of gold, with a whoop Harry threw the quaffle straight up into the air and took off after the snitch.

Draco realised what was happening and tore off after Harry, but he was too late. The snitch was already struggling in the Gryfindor's tight grip. Draco watched as Harry dove, still holding the snitch and caught the quaffle with one hand right before it hit the ground. Draco was quite impressed by Harry's flying, though he'd never admit it. How could someone who'd taken most of the year off still be that good? Despite himself, Draco was smiling as he landed next to Harry. "Rematch, Potter? I'm just getting the hang of this game of yours."

Harry smiled teasingly, "can't Draco, it's lunchtime and I'm starving." And with that he locked up the balls, shouldered his broom, and made his way towards the castle. Draco could only follow morosely behind him.

Harry felt ecstatic for the rest of the day. He had felt like he was back in the mirror, but this was better, it was real. And the incredible thing was that Draco had kept pestering him until he'd agreed to a rematch the following Saturday.

At the rematch Harry won again, but Draco made them keep playing until he'd finally won a game. By the time they were finished playing they were both utterly exhausted, and simply laid on the grass next to each other for a while.

"So," Harry said after he'd finally caught his breath, "friends then?"

"What?"

"Can't we be friends now?"

Draco snorted, "don't be ridiculous Potter."

"Why not? We've just spent our entire Saturday together."

"I couldn't possibly be friends with a Gryffindor." Harry scowled at this, but his face lightened somewhat when Draco said, "we could be acquaintances though."

" Well it's a step up from enemies, alright then Draco."

"Hey! You still don't get to call me that!" Draco fumed, and Harry just smiled at him. Things were going well.

Despite Draco's assertion that he could never be friends with a Gryffindor, the two had grown awfully close over the next month. They played one-on-one quidditch often, bantered but never fought, and even studied together. Harry was swimming in his happiness. Draco acted as if things had always been this way. But Harry noted a significant shift in their relationship one day in the library.

They had been working on their transfiguration essay, pouring over books, when Harry noticed Draco looking at him strangely. "What's wrong Draco?"

Draco's head snapped back around sharply. "Ah nothing, Harry. Just, er, dozed off for a second there."

Harry was stunned by the use of his given name. Draco had never called him Harry before; this was definitely a good sign. Harry was so pleased by this new development his essay ended up being a whole five inches longer than required.

Unfortunately the good rapport between the two ended rather abruptly. Harry didn't know what to make of it. One day they'd shared friendly banter and the next day Draco wouldn't talk to him. In fact Draco wouldn't even look at him. It was strange, but Harry let it go figuring that Draco would come round in a day or two. But after a week of Draco's silence, Harry became upset. He thought they were becoming close, and he couldn't recall doing anything that would have upset the blonde so much. So, he felt completely justified in cornering Draco and using a leg-locking spell on him, as far as Harry was concerned Draco had it coming.

Draco cursed when he felt the spell hit him, but could do little else, and fell in a very ungraceful way that made Harry wince at the subsequent collision of Draco and the floor.

When Harry knelt down and helped the fallen form sit up, all Draco could do was scowl.

"Don't look at me like that Draco," Harry recoiled under the icy gaze. "You completely deserve this for ignoring me all week. I thought we were friends."

"And I thought I told you we couldn't be friends."

"Well you've been acting like a friend to me, but maybe you didn't notice it."

"So what? I'll correct it now. We're not friends, and I won't act like one to you anymore either."

"Why?" Harry sounded rather frail, and despite himself this saddened Draco. When he replied his voice had lost its malice.

"Look Harry, some things are better for you not to know. Lets just pretend that we've always hated each other. Going back to the way things used to be will make everything so much easier."

"Easier for you maybe, but I don't hate you, and I can't pretend that I do." Harry's voice had regained firmness to it, but Draco was beginning to crack.

"God Harry! You're so dense! Don't you know who I am? I've told you before, I'm a death eater's son. And soon I'll be a death eater too. We'll be enemies again, and you will hate me. It's better this way."

Harry felt a chill run through him. It made sense now, but he couldn't give up now, not when he'd been getting so close. "Don't join them Draco."

"I don't have a choice Harry. My father's already bargained me, and the dates been set."

"That doesn't matter. Don't do it."

"It's not that simple!"

"Yes it is. You don't want to be a death eater, I can tell."

"We don't always get what we want. You know that. My father-"

"Screw your father!" Harry was livid. "The man's never really cared for you! You don't owe him anything!"

"I know," Draco's voice was timid, "but I'm afraid of him."

At this Harry smiled. "Don't worry about him. I'll take care of him and Voldemort too. I'll destroy Voldemort, even if it's just to keep you from getting his ugly mark on your flawless skin." Harry must've realised he'd said too much because he was blushing.

Draco noted this and smirked. "Why Harry, I didn't know you had such an affection for my skin."

Harry blushed deeper, and Draco continued to taunt him. "My my, Mr. Potter. Does the Daily Prophet know you have a fondness for boys? This would be front page news."

"Oh shut up!" Harry was too flustered to think of a good retort.

"You're cute when you're embarrassed, Harry."

"I what?"

"You heard me. You're cute. I think you're cute."

Harry blinked stupidly a few times. Was Draco flirting with him? He'd never dreamed the scenario turning out this way, he'd always imagined sweeping Draco of his feet somehow. Of course he had to admit that was a silly idea. Draco was no blushing maiden. In fact Harry was the one blushing now. He couldn't think of a single thing to say back to Draco. But he didn't have to. Draco leaned toward Harry, breaching the gap between them. When their lips touched Harry felt the world around them dissolve. For that moment everything was perfect. It didn't matter that his knees were sore from kneeling on stone, it didn't matter that a deranged dark wizard wanted to kill him. Nothing else mattered at that moment, nothing else existed. It was just him and Draco. It was heaven.

After their moment among the stars ended and they parted to breathe, Draco assented to Harry's firm position on not becoming a death eater. Harry was well pleased and found himself moved to kiss Draco again. Draco however thought it most undesirable to snog on a stone floor, and very undignified as he was still under the leg-locking curse. Harry had quite forgotten this latter fact, and as unabashedly as he could, released Draco from the invisible bindings of the spell. Harry helped Draco stand, and as they went to find a more suitable space for their amorous activities, their hands stayed firmly intertwined.

In the days that followed they found it extremely hard to hide their status as a couple. Mostly because the energy it would've required to properly disguise the situation became reallocated to other tasks, such as making out whenever possible. But this oversight in propriety led to definite discovery, and if the subsequent gossip around Hogwarts wasn't bad enough, the embarrassment of the two boys was almost crippling when Witch Weekly announced their relationship to the entirety of Great Britain.

Draco could only be grateful of his extreme confidence that his father would not be reading the article tucked away as he was in Azkaban. Of course he knew Luscious Malfoy would find out somehow, and though he did fear the wrath of his father, especially as his shift in loyalties and abandonment of the death eater initiation would result in Luscious being kept from rescue indefinitely, Draco was assured that Harry would keep him safe. He had grown a lot of faith in the Gryffindor and his abilities to defeat the Dark Lord. As such, he was able to firmly put his put loyalties behind him and stand strongly by Harry's side. He even found himself able to form a relationship of mutual civility with Gryffindor house. The school had accepted their relationship with a good deal of teasing, but very little malice. Though Ron had promised to knot Draco's limbs into a very unappealing shape should he betray Harry, and Hermione similarly threatened with a particularly nasty hex. All in all Hogwarts was a perfect place for Harry and Draco's blossoming romance.

On a particularly nice evening, Harry and Draco sat close together watching the sunset. Draco had originally refused to do anything so horribly clichéd as sunset watching, but Harry had insisted with a tight grip on his arm. Draco had now relaxed by Harry's side, they were talking in soft tones as the light waned in spectacular colours.

"I'm glad you're with me, Draco," Harry said slipping his arm around the blonde's waist.

"Well the sunset isn't too bad, once you get over the sissyness of this scenario."

Harry stifled his laugh, "not just right now. I mean to say, I'm happy we're together. It means a lot you being with me."

Draco wrinkled his nose and looked into Harry's face. "Don't get overly sentimental now, or you'll find yourself swimming in the lake."

Harry made an exasperated noise. "I'm not trying to be sentimental, I just wanted you to know that having you makes it better for me. I finally feel like I've got something to fight for. Before you there wasn't much to make defeating Voldemort appealing. I would've done it out of obligation, destiny, or whatever. But I didn't see much of a point to it for me personally. There wasn't anything I wanted that getting rid of him could get me. Until now, that is. Now I want a life with you, and for that I'll destroy him wholeheartedly." Harry paused for a second, "alright, that was horribly sentimental. Throw me in the lake then, I deserve it." But Draco just leaned in closer and rested his head on Harry's shoulder.

"I ought to. But I think I'd rather sit just like this for now. Honestly, I'm afraid I may be a bit sentimental too."

As the sun cast its last embers the two boys held each other tightly. They knew the time would come soon enough when they would not be afforded situations like this. But they also knew they'd get through it together. And because of that, the coming sunrise would be beautiful too.

Well, that's it. I'm sorry this is so short, but length is certainly not my forte. I'm a poet by nature and I tend to say things in the shortest or most elegant way possible. I know this can rob my prose writing of explanatory detail, and sometimes of comprehension itself. I tried my best the make this piece cohesive, and with it's rather simple plot I couldn't stretch it any further.

I hope you liked it though, as I certainly enjoyed writing it. This piece has been a really nice warm-up bit for me as I've another more complicated story that I'm working on. It seems like it's going to be an epic of sorts, and when I started writing it that scared me a bit. I've never written anything very long, but I feel much more confidant about it after finishing Erised Pain.

I received a lot of lovely reviews on Erised Pain, and I want to say how much I appreciated them. It makes writing even more satisfying knowing that it's being enjoyed. I tend not to share my poetry as it gets rather personal, but nothing beats the feeling of having your work well received and complemented. Thank you all so much! And if there is anything I can do better please let me know, we're all amateurs after all.

Ja!

-Nyu


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